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Absent of my body and present before God
I could not shake the feeling that I was a fraud
Knowing my life paled next to his measuring rod
I was nothing but shattered and broken and flawed

Immediately my life flashed before my eyes
And all that I could see was my family’s cries
Seeing all the inflicted hurt and pain and lies
Tearing apart my heart as pieces of me dies

One by one and pain by pain the images flash
Realizing things I thought I built turned to ash
Everything I had amassed was a pile of trash
Seeing my life as just one gigantic train crash

Uncontrollably I dropped to my knees and wept
Living a life as far as one can from perfect
Leaving a lot of people’s lives totally wrecked
How could he who sits enthrone ever me accept

Silencing my scared mind with a raise of his hand
Leaving his throne the Lord ran right to where I stand
Wrapping his arms around me he gave a command
Calling for a feast to be prepared that was grand

His arms around me felt welcoming warm and sweet
Feeling a weight drop off I stood light on my feet
Gentle love engulfing me as our eyes did meet
Welcome home my son he did to little me greet

Tears emerged from both my eyes and ran down my face
Releasing the Lord stepped back from our snug embrace
Smiling he said that what I was feeling was grace
Granted the instant in my heart I gave him place

Raising his hand he motioned down a golden street
Frozen I stood mesmerized by shiny concrete
Nigh had I seen something so perfectly complete
Speaking I stated it was so pretty and sweet

Chuckling a loud hearty laugh the lord turned to me
Clutching my hand he said that all that I could see
Was created with one purpose for it to be
That God and I could live in peaceful harmony

– Written from my father-in-law’s perspective after he passed away on July 12, 2018.

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